Infertility, Our Infertility story, Surrogacy

Surrogate Dreams

September 13, 2012

Our surrogate dreams may not be over yet.

I have debated and debated about posting about this.

I have shared every intimate detail of my life on here thus far. So, what’s changed?

I don’t know. I guess I have taken a hiatus from infertility for a while and maybe I feel like if I talk about it, it will rule my life again.  Also, I like being on hiatus from infertility. I guess I am feeling better overall and therefore don’t need to let my feelings constantly spill out of me in the form of typed words to feel better.  I guess I’m scared, too.  I’m afraid to jinx something.

But, I know that’s silly.  If this is God’s plan, then it will be so.  Silly jinxing hocus pocus has nothing to do with it.

So, here goes.  A girl randomly contacted me about a month ago and she found me through this website.  She offered to be our surrogate. Everything about the situation is great.  She is the absolute sweetest, cutest thing.  She’s young and healthy.  She has great insurance.  And, she’s moving sort-of close to us soon.  (At least we hope…it’s almost sure…but a little complicated.)

Her name is my middle name.  She has two adorable kids.

It just doesn’t seem real.  I am in constant contact with her and she’s a new friend, but it’s hard to wrap my mind around the fact that she could be our miracle.

It’s hard to imagine that a complete stranger sought me out and feels called to do this.  It’s hard to imagine that she was so touched by our story that she wants to do this for us.  It’s hard to imagine that this connection happened because of this website.

While I have one eye on the future, I still have one on the past.  I am hopeful, but scared.

(If you know me in real life, please keep this quiet.  We are not ready to discuss this just yet, but we would appreciate your prayers.)




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  • Heather

    As much as I understand your hesitation, I am getting out my cheer outfit with pom poms and jumping up and down to say Wooo Hooo! I am excited for you and you know what, you are entitled to some good news for a change. So just enjoy the possibilities 🙂

  • Jess

    Always sending you the biggest positive vibes my friend. I understand completely the hesitation to embrace completely. But you deserve a miracle and believing in karma as I do, I believe you are way way overdue? So why not believe in it now? Good luck and good wishes!

  • Marisa

    I cried when I read this. I have been following your story for a long time now. and always think about you and wonder where things stand in your IF journey. I think it’s incredible that someone reached out to you with this gift and I truly hope that this path works. I know it can be hard to decide when/if/how to share infertility stuff but just know that by telling your story you are making a difference for a lot of people. No matter how much or how little you end up sharing in the future I’m always thinking about you and hoping your dreams come true.

    • Whitney

      Thank you so much, Marisa. That is so sweet. It’s been a long journey for sure, but somehow we are still hopeful.

  • Hi there Whitney, I just found your blog on the ICLW list and thought I would drop in and say an early Hi! This news is amazing! As a future IM myself (I hope!) I can only dream on someone so kindly offering to be my carrier out of nowhere! Embrace the small victories!

  • Connie

    As I read your post, tears were welling up in my eyes. I pray for you all often and hope this will be time that God will rain down blessings on you and Erick! Sending a big hug and continued prayers for this journey. =)

  • Hi from ICLW (#26),

    I just read your story and I am so sorry for your struggle and for your losses. I am wishing you all the best with this new found ray of hope. Sending you virtual hugs!

  • Danielle

    Hi Whitney,
    I just came across your blog after a random Google on karyotype testing. So far I’ve had two “official” miscarriages, with another early stage one last week — “unofficial” since it was so early (my terms). After living the last two years in a constant state of uncertainty, hoping that this would be the time, reading your words has hardened my resolve to undergo further testing at this point. Thanks for being so open and discussing such a personal matter in such a public way. Infertility and miscarriage are exceptionally isolating, particularly within the greater world of Facebook and Twitter announcements of pregnancies, first steps, etc, that it is refreshing to read an intelligent woman’s account of her experience and research. My thoughts are with you and your husband.

  • What great progress! I hope things keep progressing smoothly with this wonderful woman as your surrogate!

  • Hello from ICLW. What an incredible thing for you guys. Thinking of you and sending vibes that this pans out. Wishing you the best!!

    ICLW #3

  • Lilliana

    Hi Whitney, I came across your blog looking for an answer about my own treatment.
    Have you tried contacting New hope fertility clinic? I think they offer the egg donor and surrogate mother options. So far my treatment with Dr. Zhang has been amazing and given us great results. Good luck!

  • Cassie Linn

    I’m a loving mum of 4 healthy kids. I seem to have a knack for getting pregnant lol. I love it and being a mom! I am a private care nurse for a lovely elderly couple with Alzheimer’s and some family joked that I’m so good at it, I should do it professionally. After a good laugh, I am seriously considering this. I don’t necessarily need the money, even tho it wouldn’t hurt 😂 But I would love to help fellow parents find there purpose aswell! I started searching and they all advertise this huge pay check 50-60 thousand. I thought wow, what about the pre-parents that don’t have 50k laying around? They deserve to suffer by the hands of these kids too 😂 So here I am, putting myself out here. I am 35, in decent shape, honest and giving. My kids and I live in a 4 bedroom home in San Diego. My oldest is 18 and my youngest is 6 and I have full coverage health insurance. If you know of or are interested in meeting my family and I to see if this could work, please email me at