Infertility, Our Infertility story

Back to “unexplained” infertility and loss

April 12, 2011

The immune results are in.  And, they’re negative!  I’m really disappointed.  I was convinced this was the problem.  See my initial post about my phone consult with Dr. S here.  I was ok with having this as a problem, because it’s treatable.  I thought we would finally have an answer for everything that has happened and finally be armed with the information to overcome this.  Nope.  No activated NK cells, no DQ alpha match, no nothing.

Now, we’re back to square one.  Unexplained infertility and pregnancy loss.  I don’t know what to do now.  I was sort of already resigned to the fact that immune issues were the problem.  Now, we have no idea.  Bad luck.  Poor embryos.  Poor eggs.  Some other random problem.  Who knows?  I have been tested eight ways to Sunday, so there’s nothing left there.  If I’m not the problem, then we have to assume the problem lies with the embryos.

  • So, do we blindly continue on and hope a cycle works out on sheer luck?  How much can I take?
  • Do we try again with Pre-implantation Genetic Screening (PGS) ?  That would ideal if I had another $5000-6000 lying around to fork over.  Comprehensive Genetic Screening (CGS) isn’t even an option as my clinic doesn’t do it.
  • Do we try donor embryos?
  • Do we decide that this is enough and pursue adoption?
  • Do we decide that this is it?

These are mind-blowing, life-altering questions for which I don’t have the answers.

I absolutely hate this unknowing, this uncertainty, this fumbling around.

I feel like our last shot at a biological child is no longer within reach. This is sobering.  I’ve had too many of these moments.

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  • Jay

    Whitney, I work in science. Its amazing how much is not known, and how there can be a tiny needle in a giant haystack that is the cause of everything, but you have no very little chance of finding.

    I’m not really familiar with your history, but does your ovarian reserve look good? If I remember right, none of your embryos were tested right? It might just be the egg factor- or sometimes its just a simple mismatch. Like you have a bad copy of 1 gene and your husband has the a corresponding bad copy of the same gene…both of you are ok, but if you both contribute the bad copy to your child, it cannot survive. Its really impossible to know WHAT the problem is, because you have so many options to choose from. But if you ever want somebody to brainstorm with, I’ll be very happy to lend a ear.

  • Unexplained is truly the worst! I’m so sorry you still don’t have this stuff figured out. So what does Sher suggest now? You should have a follow-up after the results come in to go over his plan for you, whether or not you take his advice or even work with him. I wish you had a clearer path to take… Enjoy your mojito!

  • I’m so sorry Whitney – the not knowing is definitely the worst. 🙁

    Enjoy your mojito tonight, and I hope your mind is clearer tomorrow.

  • marilyn

    So sorry!! this sucks. Unexplained…this is frustrating. Enjoy that Mojito or three!!

  • Jess

    I’m so sorry there are more questions and less answers with this new information. Thinking of you…

  • cory

    i’m sorry, whitney! i’m also familiar with unexplained infertility. it sucks. 🙁

  • I’m sorry. I know it would have been a relief to be able to put a name to the problem and address it head on. Totally understandable that you’re so frustrated.

  • C

    Sorry you still don’t have any answers. That’s so frustrating 🙁

  • Thank you so much for your kind comments on my blog this week…means a lot. And so sorry for all you have been through and continue to go through…I can’t imagine. Hugs to you as you try to negotiate next steps.

  • Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and sharing your story. I really appreciated hearing your take on things.

    I am so sorry that you are back to “unexplained” with all of this, and that all your testing has unearthed nothing new. Those are some pretty heavy questions/choices you are facing. (((Hugs)))